Aaron Blabey has written a paper on consciousness and the ideal of self.
Aaron is trying to overcome his feelings of insecurity. To do so, he needs a home: a dwelling, a territory, or perhaps a safe space or setting where he can rest, and let down his systems of defense against the outer world, which he finds aggressive and hostile. He is ready to make some sacrifices in order to maintain and consolidate the structure he has chosen. True inner security, based on real knowledge of himself, his abilities, and his shortcomings, his strengths and his weaknesses would no doubt be most effective and would allow him to remain open to the varieties of experience offered by the world.
Aaron has a paternal complex and, as a result, some trouble finding his identity. Perhaps his father or a father figure was absent physically or emotionally during his childhood, which deprived him of the patterns or models which are usually helpful in structuring a personality. Because he might have lacked a particular sense of security which could be provided by a paternal presence, as well as the examples of behavior to follow in confronting the difficulties inherent in every life, he was forced to protect himself against negative influences and find his own system in order to grow and feel secure.
Although this system was quite useful to him as a child, it has now settled in to such a degree that it interferes with his evolution. Psychological defense mechanisms and crutches which were once useful now encumber his mind or inhibit his developmental efforts. As a result, in certain situations, it is difficult for him to assert himself, and he tends to remain an awkward or passive observer. Because his authoritarian urges are mainly directed at himself rather than others, he sometimes feels guilty about his behavior. He judges himself severely, and sometimes punishes himself by setting difficult tasks for himself. Gradually, he should build up a strong inner discipline and acquire the strength to face the problems of existence in a detached and mature way.
Aaron's personality and behavior are liable to be disrupted by a contradiction between the masculine and feminine archetypes ruling his psyche. Because his sensitivity is in conflict with his determination, his attitude and performance may be moody, fluctuating, and uncertain. Usually, he has the feeling he has to make superhuman efforts to succeed in assuaging his yearnings and fulfilling his ambitions. His unconscious, sensitive side often disapproves of his conscious endeavors and stealthily works to defeat them, causing crucial omissions, mistakes, and gaps which effectively sabotage his plans. In his relationships, the images he builds up and projects on the other are contradictory. As a result, any bond, even if it is pleasant and positive, also grates on his nerves. He finds it dissatisfying and irritating at the same time.
Aaron has great strength of character. His courage and endurance enable him to accomplish even extremely arduous tasks. Although he sometimes behaves impulsively, he generally knows how to plan out an effective strategy, and, as a result, he reaches his goals without meeting any major obstacles. His forcefulness gives him certain leadership skills, which he may implement to creative and constructive ends.
Aaron has an inalienable awareness of the void and the vanity of existence. He is sometimes disoriented and deconstructed by an unknowable, unconscious force and tends to ignore or disparage the superficial pleasures and pains of daily life, preferring to dive into the depths of human experience as deeply as his intellectual, emotional, and spiritual capacities permit. Grappling with his “fundamental nature,” with the deepest and most primitive part of himself, he is sometimes aghast at the discovery of the sheer power of the life instinct and feels an imperious need to cope with it. This special consciousness he has been endowed with is somewhat beyond the bounds of conventional schools of human understanding and thought and may be a source of identity problems for him at the outset. It is not easy for him to recognize himself in any social or narcissistic models or identify with any existing roles or attitudes, so he sometimes finds himself forced to construct and assert his own identity on a basis which may impress others with its intensity, if not its eccentricity.
Aaron has adapted well to the challenges of his new job. He is sensitive to the needs of his co-workers and is able to work well with them.
Aaron has a personality which is sometimes agitated but straightforward. Unconscious feelings of insecurity compel him to act and sometimes to seek the admiration of others. As a result, he is unable to bear idleness and routine, and he is in search of perpetual excitement. His reactions to others are highly individual and depend on the mood he is in at any given moment. A person of decision, a businessperson or an athlete, he often personifies boldness and impetuosity. His love life is liable to be fiery, as it obeys the imperatives of his desire for freedom and independence, and his need for change.
Aaron has a lively, agile, and sensitive intellect. However, he does not always avail himself of it and may be confused or irrational in some situations. Although he enjoys playing with words, ideas, and concepts, his thought sometimes lacks discipline and structure. He is fairly preoccupied with details and may tend to waste his nervous and mental energy in futile verbal outpourings. Moreover, his feelings sometimes blur his objective vision of phenomena and people, which may cause him to make errors in judgment.
Aaron has a cool and distant demeanor, but he is extremely sensitive. In some cases, his rather austere and rigid behavior and refusal to yield too readily to sentimentality discourage others from being too demonstrative of their tenderness and affection. He has spells of melancholy in which he does not feel worthy of being loved and tend to forbid himself emotional fulfillment. An austere or somewhat traumatic childhood experience may be the source of this behavior. It is difficult for his inner self to be detached from this past life, and he sometimes has trouble reconciling the image he has of himself as an adult with the one he acquired back then. The idea he has of himself as an individual is related to the image his parents projected onto him as a child. Nevertheless, the past is history, and he is now an adult. It should be easy for him to rid himself of these phantoms through self-work. He has the ability to overcome his mistakes and great endurance and will power to achieve his goals. However, he must not repress his sensitivity in order to succeed.
Aaron has a nagging feeling of insecurity which affects his psychology and dampens his natural enthusiasm. His need to take action and assert himself is sometimes disturbed by this gnawing fear.
Aaron has a sensitivity and irrepressible imagination that sometimes causes him trouble distinguishing dreams from reality. Although his imagination can be an abundant source of inspiration for creative or spiritual evolution, it tends to be less helpful and positive in matters that concern earning a decent living out in the real world. In a relationship, Aaron is extremely romantic and does not always see others the way they really are. He has elegant tastes and art and beauty are one of his chief pleasures in life.
Aaron has a sensitivity and emotions that are sometimes in conflict with his instincts. This inner discord makes him a fairly complicated relationship partner, and his behavior sometimes strikes others as mysterious or baffling. He is liable to switch from one attitude to the opposite. Sexuality is an important part of his life, and his relationships are most often motivated by his desires. Nevertheless, due to his unconscious inner battle, he does not often succeed in reconciling and fulfilling his emotional and sexual needs. Due to the strength of his instincts, passion may overwhelm him and drag him into situations he cannot always control, which intermingle erotic ecstasy and anguish, guilt, and aggressiveness.
Aaron Blabey has a love and sensuality which is both passionate and restrained.
Aaron Blabey is looking for the ideal love and tends to idealize his friends and lovers. A bizarre character, he may prefer to dream of his soulmate instead of making love to one; he is more in love with the idea of love than anything else. His idealism may hide a fear of truly committing himself to a relationship; he tries to intellectualize everything. In time, two options will seem clear to him: an amorous friendship based on shared ideas and intellectual exchange, or an open relationship, free of all constraints except mutual respect.
Aaron's birth chart indicates an emotional function which is usually expressed carefully and reasonably. Distrustful of his emotional urges and somewhat wary of his feelings, he tries to rid himself of all partiality and try to get some perspective and distance before making an emotional commitment.
Aaron Blabey is determined and competent, quite adept in his career but somewhat less so in his private life. His strength of will may scare some people away. He is subject to intense passions, but they are rarely happy. Sometimes he tries to repress his feelings, and at others, his love life is crippled by fate.
Aaron Blabey has because tendency to be naive and idealistic as far as love is concerned. In many cases, he will be irresistibly attracted to a person who is not at all right for him or whose aspirations are diametrically opposed to him. If he marries, his relationship may sometimes be conflicting.
Aaron Blabey may be characterized by strong sensual and affectionate urges which drive him to seek pleasure. His need for romantic fulfillment may compel him to marry, because he also seeks the legal and social legitimacy the institution of marriage confers on an emotional bond. Indeed, the household is liable to be prosperous and even opulent, as if this offered further evidence that he had indeed achieved success. However, privately, he might be less committed to certain obligations and duties.
Aaron has a great emotional ideal, full of subtlety and tenderness. However, he tends to be overwhelmed by his imagination and may not be selective enough when choosing a partner. His romantic and trusting nature may make him vulnerable. Although he strives to establish peaceful, uncomplicated relations, he sometimes experiences painful disappointments. His artistic delicacy and refinement provide him with a sincere love of the arts, music, and literature. He is likely to be a gifted poet.
Aaron has a good balance between his need for movement and his tendency to be sedentary. He is just as likely to adapt to situations which require outbursts of initiative as to those which demand patience and perseverance.
Aaron has a strong mental and intellect. He is able to process information quickly and make sound judgments.
Aaron Blabey sometimes considers the input from his subjectivity and emotions as static which he tries to tune out to go straight to the essence of knowledge. As a result, regardless of his field of study, he tries to obtain perspective. He will elaborate a thought on the basis of fairly cold, abstract logic, supported by sober, concise, and immaculate reasoning. His choice areas of study could be mathematics, philosophy, legislation, or political science. Ideologies, theories, and any other system of reasoning could serve as “food for thought” for him.
Aaron expresses his thoughts and ideas in direct, spontaneous outbursts. He is fairly extroverted and eager to discover and understand the outer world. An idealist, he looks forward to a bright future but is sometimes subjective and reckless.
Aaron Blabey has a lively and agile spirit. He is curious and open-minded, approaching various life experiences with an attitude free of dogmatism and prejudice. As a result of his great mental vitality, he tends to have an opinion on every subject, but he does not always have the patience necessary to examine a subject in-depth.
Aaron enjoys manipulating expressions and concepts and amuses himself with witty remarks, satire, and controversy. If he learned to control his flow of words and elaborate his thoughts more, he could make a talented communicator. Because he is often too hasty to formulate and construct the arguments which would back up and inform his ideas, he is sometimes misunderstood.
Aaron is often blind to the rashness of his judgments and convinced they are well-founded and objective, which sometimes irritates the people around him. If he were to succeed in disciplining his mind somewhat, he would have innumerable opportunities to apply his communications skills to a great career. However, he would do well to be careful of his nerves.
Aaron has a distaste for study, which might require a great deal of effort for him. He could harbor feelings of insecurity that are so acute that they may undermine his will and therefore his ability to compete. However, if he overcame these emotions, he would see that he has plenty of marketable skills and that many satisfactory solutions to his feelings of ineptitude and inadequacy are within his reach.