Allison Holker searches for stability in her life. She wants to find a firm, unchanging structure that will offer her a sense of security. But her attempts to achieve this ideal are often futile, because she also desires change and instability. Every time she reaches what she believes to be a good balance, she realizes she wants something entirely different. She should become aware that the concepts of stability and balance are difficult to apply to life. By definition, life is movement, change, and perpetual instability.
Allison Holker has great strength of character. Her courage and endurance enable her to accomplish even extremely arduous tasks. Although she sometimes behaves impulsively, she generally knows how to plan out an effective strategy, and, as a result, she reaches her goals without meeting any major obstacles. Her forcefulness gives her certain leadership skills, which she may implement to creative and constructive ends.
Allison Holker is a person with an inalienable awareness of the void and the vanity of existence. She is sometimes disoriented and deconstructed by an unknowable, unconscious force and tends to ignore or disparage the superficial pleasures and pains of daily life, preferring to dive into the depths of human experience as deeply as her intellectual, emotional, and spiritual capacities permit. Grappling with her “fundamental nature,” with the deepest and most primitive part of herself, she is sometimes aghast at the discovery of the sheer power of the life instinct and feels an imperious need to cope with it. This special consciousness she has been endowed with is somewhat beyond the bounds of conventional schools of human understanding and thought and may be a source of identity problems for her at the outset. It is not easy for her to recognize herself in any social or narcissistic models or identify with any existing roles or attitudes, so she sometimes finds herself forced to construct and assert her own identity on a basis which may impress others with its intensity, if not its eccentricity.
Allison Holker prefers to plan things out in advance, often following a rigid model based on logical or moral reasons. She doesn’t express her personal feelings or emotions easily, and may come across as a stiff person to some. However, her diligentness and attention to detail make her successful in a work environment, and she enjoys spending time with friends and family. Her natural taste for clarity, detail, and technique would make her a great scientist or high-tech designer.
Allison Holker’s intellect is lively, agile, and sensitive. However, she does not always avail herself of it and may be confused or irrational in some situations. Although she enjoys playing with words, ideas, and concepts, her thought sometimes lacks discipline and structure. She is fairly preoccupied with details and may tend to waste her nervous and mental energy in futile verbal outpourings. Furthermore, her feelings sometimes blur her objective vision of phenomena and people, which may cause her to make errors in judgment.
Allison Holker maintains strong ties with her past, and it often seems difficult for her to open her heart to new people. Her love affairs might exist on the surface level, because her lust and sensual desire rarely turn into a need to understand, protect, and care for the other. Moreover, it is difficult for her to meet partners who combine the ideals of the tender parent and the great lover.
Although your demeanor is cool and distant, you are extremely sensitive. In some cases, your rather austere and rigid behavior and refusal to yield too readily to sentimentality discourage others from being too demonstrative of their tenderness and affection. You have spells of melancholy in which you do not feel worthy of being loved and tend to forbid yourself emotional fulfillment. An austere or somewhat traumatic childhood experience may be the source of this behavior. It is difficult for your inner self to be detached from this past life, and you sometimes have trouble reconciling the image you have of yourself as an adult with the one you acquired back then. The idea you have of yourself as an individual is related to the image your parents projected onto you as a child. Nevertheless, the past is history, and you are now an adult. It should be easy for you to rid yourself of these phantoms through self-work. You have the ability to overcome your mistakes and great endurance and will power to achieve your goals. Nevertheless, you must not repress your sensitivity in order to succeed.
Allison Holker is rigid, might struggle to make friends easily, and is sometimes wary of relations with those she is most attracted to. She is a gifted worrywart.
Allison Holker reacts emotionally and excessively whenever her sensitivity is touched. Although she values her independence, freedom, and self-sufficiency, she sometimes gets frustrated by her need to rely on her family or friends. Additionally, she does not always grant the freedom of other people the same respect as her own. Additionally, she can be angered by expressions of maternal tenderness, as if she fears that it will doom her to eternal dependency. Her ambivalent behavior, full of jagged edges, may be traced back to the relationship she had with her mother or a mother figure. Although she was dependent on them, they may have rejected her. Now this attitude is extended to any situation in which her sensitivity comes into play and emotional bonds are liable to form. To ward off her feelings of dependency, she sometimes tends to become destructive. Based on denial, her reactions might be fierce, impulsive, excessive, erratic, or contradictory.
Allison Holker’s sensitivity often overwhelms her partners, and her compassion for the other is profound. She readily sacrifices her own interest to others, to provide help and assistance. A romantic as well as an idealist, she sometimes lacks discernment in the choice of her partners. She is fairly confused and evasive and has trouble expressing her feelings clearly. Nevertheless, she is capable of devoting herself entirely to the person she loves. She has a tendency to daydream and become lost in herself.
Allison Holker’s birth chart indicates that she has an emotional function that is usually expressed carefully and reasonably. She distrusts her emotional urges and is somewhat wary of her feelings, so she tries to rid herself of all partiality and get some perspective and distance before making an emotional commitment.
Allison Holker, Romantic and idealistic, as well as modest and inhibited, tends to stay in the background, living vicariously through her imagination. Reality is less rosy, and her human qualities and virtues as a loving, devoted companion are not always recognized. To succeed in a happy relationship, she must become aware that she is the source of the positive or negative energy she invests and that in love and in life, she will reap what she sow.
The person who loves Allison Holker does not always have satisfying relationships. They may have affairs that are short and hurtful. They may be drawn to people who have less purpose or who argue frequently.
Allison Holker is hypersensitive and tends to relive the anxieties, apprehensions, and romantic absolutes of her first love relationships, which occurred around the ages of 13-14 years or 20-21 years. She is exquisitely sensitive, but almost completely barricaded behind a layer of aloofness. She will not settle for anything less than eternal commitment, total harmony, and absolute loyalty. She is sometimes presumed to be cold, even by those close to her. She usually hides her emotional reactions or does not even allow them to reach the level of her consciousness, in an effort to protect her sensitivity, which she sees as her weak point. She is fairly vulnerable, even in the intimacy of a stable and established relationship. Usually, she will disguise her strong feelings as a kind of possessiveness or even jealousy. Certain misfortunes may arouse a negative emotional state inside her, and she feels unworthy of the love which is lavished on her. This psychological prohibition which rules over all of her desires and affects should loosen with the passage of time; likewise, her fear of approaching the other will diminish. As a result, the second part of her romantic life will be more rewarding. In any case, if you want to experience a harmonious love relationship and gratify yourself emotionally, the defense mechanisms you have elaborated to make yourself inaccessible to others will have to be dismantled. Any profound relationship will also require that you learn how to forget yourself occasionally in the other.
Allison Holker is an ardent and amorous person, and her relationships are enlivened by intensity and passion. She is often more in love with the idea of love than with a partner, and her love life may be subject to some instability. She is generally attracted to original people who defy norms, standards, and classifications, and expect them to amaze and fascinate her. Her greatest contradictions surface when an intimate relationship is established. Although she merges her ego entirely into the couple, she is likely to demand a total autonomy and liberty which are inimical to intimacy. If her partner charms and captivates her long enough, there is some possibility that they will form a more solid bond with her; otherwise, she is likely to yield to her need for novelty and fall under the spell of an entirely different person who exerts a new kind of charm for her.
Midlife may be a turning point for her from this point of view. Her contradictory attitude may in some ways hide a compulsion to reject and deny the bonds of dependency inherent to a love relationship. Her behavior enables her to remain aloof, to commit herself only halfway without consciously admitting it to herself, and to avoid feeling guilty if and when she loses interest. An insatiable appetite for novelty and exaltation sometimes keeps her from forming stable relationships. Indeed, she is tormented by the struggle between her undeniable need for affection and an equally imperious desire for personal progress and emancipation. As a result of this inner turmoil, her romantic aspirations are usually sabotaged sooner or later by her conviction that her partner has become an obstacle to her individual progress. Because she thinks of love as a restraint, she may even eventually consciously refuse any emotional approach to love interests. As an ascetic, she will try to deflect the love function from its natural target and use the energy and bliss it generates for other purposes, the process psychologists call sublimation. However, she is also likely to meet “the one” who inspires her to initiate a change in her behavior.
Allison Holker is a flexible individual who utilizes her creative and intuitive mind to come up with progressive and inventive ideas to solve social or human problems. She constantly strives to be ahead of the curve and create a better world for future generations.
Allison Holker does not express her thoughts and ideas smoothly or easily. She tends to be subjective, seeking to know herself better through a process of introversion.
Allison Holker’s intellectual faculties and wit are sometimes slowed down because they are turned outward. Because she tends to be oriented toward others, she rarely tries to communicate with them for the simple pleasure of doing so. Indeed, she sometimes feels misunderstood. Moreover, it seems difficult for her to express the complexity of her inner perceptions.