Steve Mambou Nguie has written a thoughtful essay on the consciousness and the ideal of self.

Steve Mambou Nguie searches for stability; he wants to find a firm, unchanging structure for his life. But his efforts to achieve this ideal are often vain, because unconsciously, he is also inhabited by the opposite desire. Every time he reaches what he believes to be a good balance, he realizes he wants something entirely different. He would do well to become aware that the concepts of stability and balance are difficult to apply to life. By definition, life is movement, change, and perpetual instability.

Steve Mambou Nguie does not always feel in tune with society’s rules and conventions. The mask of sociability most well-adapted people wear is difficult for him to assume, and it is hard for him to act out the roles expected of him as a normal member of the community. The usual social values and rewards, like money, respect, and prestige, only mildly interest him. His refusal or inability to play the social game may make it hard for him to find a job, which may have negative consequences on his financial and legal status. Reluctant and unwilling to adapt to the demands of social life, he sometimes unwittingly makes mistakes when a new project is in the planning stages. For example, he may leave gaps in a job application, botch up an interview with a prospective employer, or make a big mistake when bidding for a contract. But his financial difficulties may clear up when his emotional ones do.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a good balance between his need for movement and his tendency to be sedentary. He is just as likely to adapt to situations which require outbursts of initiative as to those which demand patience and perseverance.

Steve Mambou Nguie has an inalienable awareness of the void and the vanity of existence. He is sometimes disoriented and deconstructed by an unknowable, unconscious force and tend to ignore or disparage the superficial pleasures and pains of daily life, preferring to dive into the depths of human experience as deeply as his intellectual, emotional, and spiritual capacities permit. Grappling with his “fundamental nature,” with the deepest and most primitive part of himself, he is sometimes aghast at the discovery of the sheer power of the life instinct and feels an imperious need to cope with it. This special consciousness you have been endowed with is somewhat beyond the bounds of conventional schools of human understanding and thought and may be a source of identity problems for you at the outset. It is not easy for you to recognize yourself in any social or narcissistic models or identify with any existing roles or attitudes, so you sometimes find yourself forced to construct and assert your own identity on a basis which may impress others with its intensity, if not its eccentricity.

Steve Mambou Nguie has adapted well to the new job. He is sensitive to the needs of the customers and is able to provide them with the best service possible.

Steve Mambou Nguie is pragmatic and realistic. He evaluates people and things according to practical, common-sense criteria instead of abstract concepts. A sensualist and lover of luxury, he has a penchant for material comfort and takes great joy in physical pleasures. In relation to others, socially and privately, he likes to build stable relationships and is not especially fond of change. His warmth gives him a great deal of ease when meeting people, as clients (for business purposes), but his close relations also benefit from this affection and his ability to express his feelings naturally and openly.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a sensitive personality. He may jump to conclusions, which could disrupt relationships, as well as career plans. He is subject to cyclical energy flows and go from periods of feverish activity to periods of withdrawal and introspection. The aggressive element in his behavior may be explained by emotional problems he may have experienced in infancy: his mother, or a mother figure, may have had an energetic and volatile personality.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a good balance between his need for movement and his tendency to be sedentary. He is just as likely to adapt to situations which require outbursts of initiative as to those which demand patience and perseverance.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a good balance between his need for movement and his tendency to be sedentary. He is just as likely to adapt to situations which require outbursts of initiative as to those which demand patience and perseverance. Although his demeanor is cool and distant, he is extremely sensitive. In some cases, his rather austere and rigid behavior and his refusal to yield too readily to sentimentality discourage others from being too demonstrative of their tenderness and affection. He has spells of melancholy in which he does not feel worthy of being loved and tend to forbid himself emotional fulfillment. An austere or somewhat traumatic childhood experience may be the source of this behavior. He may have suffered rejection in his infancy, and, as a result, lacked the parental love which is essential to the cohesion of a personality and identity. In order to feel secure, and to protect himself from ever suffering rejection or abandonment again, he withdrew into himself and developed his aloofness as a defense mechanism. When he finally lets down his defenses and allows himself to express his feelings, he tends to become impassioned and exalted. He is fairly introverted and egocentric and has a powerful sense of his own identity.

Steve Mambou Nguie although pragmatic and relatively realistic, is sometimes tormented by an insidious feeling of insecurity which interferes with his ability to grasp reality. Change unnerves him, and at certain times, he tends to cling to old-fashioned customs or lifestyles. Insecurities might cause him to repress his emotional needs.

Steve has a sensitivity and irrepressible imagination. Due to this, he sometimes has trouble distinguishing dreams from reality. Although his bubbling imagination provides an abundant source of inspiration for creative or spiritual evolution, it tends to be less helpful and positive in matters that concern his self-assertion as responsible and self-sufficient. In a relationship, Steve is extremely romantic and does not always see others the way they really are.

Steve Mambou Nguie does not always readily reveal himself, and he tends to protect his sensitivity. He has a penchant for intense emotions. Sexuality is a prominent element in his life, and his relationships, which are usually passionate, are motivated by his desires. He likes to understand the hidden side of people, their secret or unconfessed motivations. He would thus find a career which placed him in contact with troubled people especially rewarding.

Steve Mambou Nguie appreciates the love and sensuality that is inherent in relationships. He enjoys spending time with those he loves and sensing their emotions.

Steve Mambou Nguie enjoys captivating people with the elegance and ease of his expression. He is a witty and engaging flirt, an avid player of the game of love. As a result, the history of his affections is liable to be episodic, a long series of chapters about conquests or fleeting love affairs. He may carry on some love relationships by writing letters.

Steve Mambou Nguie’s birth chart indicates an emotional function which is expressed in a direct and fairly impulsive way. He enjoys reaching out to other people and making discoveries. An eternal teenager with his gaze riveted on the future, he is imbued with an eminently subjective and personal idealism.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a contradictory character and cannot always reconcile his urges with reason. It is difficult for him to resist a person he’s interested in romantically, and he is liable to choose someone unsuitable, uncommitted, or fickle. He may find parenting fulfilling, and it could bring him maturity. As he becomes more peaceful, realistic, and consistent, his family life will come to the forefront. If he has children, he will nurture them as a symbol of his own fulfillment.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a delicate and sensitive soul, but with a carefree and flighty nature. He has had many romantic encounters, attracting admirers with his lively and mischievous mind. A great lover of art and literature, he is particularly attracted to outstanding people, to artists and designers, with whom he forms friendships involving a greater or lesser degree of romance. He views friendship as spiritual love and cannot conceive of a relationship that does not involve this noble sentiment.

Steve Mambou Nguie has an ardent and amorous character, and his relationships with the other sex are enlivened by intensity and passion. A charmer perpetually engaged in a quest for the ideal love, he is often more in love with the idea of love than with his partners. As a result, his love life may be subject to some instability. He is generally attracted to original people who defy norms, standards, and classifications, and expect them to amaze and fascinate him. Love is often a matter of luck with him. Even when a relationship falls apart, he does not see the experience as a failure or a tragedy; instead, he seems to learn valuable lessons from his mistakes. Psychologically, his emotion contributes positively and efficiently to his evolution. From another standpoint, his acute sensitivity predisposes him to original and subtle tastes; he is so receptive to beauty and attached to the concepts of truth and balance that they may all combine to yield remarkable creative potential.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a great mental and intellect.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a lively wit which gives him great agility and scope and a broad field of consciousness which enlivens his curiosity and makes him love variety and change. His mind is alert and his speech is full of verve, humor, and sometimes impudence. These abilities are great resources in communication, discussion, and debate. He is a storehouse of information and ideas of every kind and delights in manipulating words and concepts, discovering new things, and sharpening his memory for trivial facts. This mental agitation could sometimes make him scattered, however, or lacking in coherence and discipline.

Steve Mambou Nguie expresses his thoughts and ideas in direct, spontaneous outbursts. He is fairly extroverted and eager to discover and understand the outer world. An idealist, he looks forward to a bright future but is sometimes subjective and reckless.

Steve Mambou Nguie has a good balance between his need for movement and his tendency to be sedentary. He is just as likely to adapt to situations which require outbursts of initiative as to those which demand patience and perseverance. He sometimes makes mistakes in judgment, and his understanding of things is not always in tune with social realities or prevailing opinion. His judgments tend to be hasty; his decisions are reckless. Moreover, he tends to overestimate his abilities and usually aims higher than might be realistic. Once an enterprise or project is underway, he may try to avoid obstacles by dodging certain duties.

Because his vision of the world differs somewhat from social realities, he should be extremely careful and scrupulous in regard to legal matters, in order to avoid any complications of that type. He is sometimes slightly dishonest in his relations; he may break promises or attempt to duck responsibility.

However, he should realize that such conduct toward other people is also a form of unconscious self-loathing. If he continues to behave in such a way, he is exposing himself to the same lack of sincerity from his partners.